Friday, February 29, 2008

Will you be my friend?

When my husband and I were thinking about Homeschooling, my biggest concern for the boys was shyness. My boys were already showing signs of being shy and I didn't want that for them.

I've got nothing against shy people, but I was shy when I was little. Being shy is no fun. I used to hide behind my mom. The NOT shy people would take advantage of me. I would let my friends talk for me. (Most of the time). I wouldn't go and just do something.

It all changed when I started traveling for Wal-Mart. You can't be shy when you are in charge of at least 300 people and 7 members of management. So I became un-shy. But it was hard work. I was in my 20's when that happened and I missed out on a lot of friendships and adventures because of my shyness.

So when we were talking about it, I told Hubster that I wanted to see what we could do to get the shyness out of the boys. We were already facing some opposition from people who said that Homeschooling didn't let the boys socialize. Whatever!

If you were to meet my boys and not know they were homeschooled, you would be surprised. They are not shy at all. And they make friends very easily.

But I've noticed that when kids make friends, they are not like us adults. They don't care about little things, they just want a friend.

For example, when we adults meet another adult, we ask them their name. And then we try to up one on them. Not intentionaly, but we do. You know, when the other person says that they have a certain model of car, then you say you have this other model. When the other person says they have 3 bathrooms in their house, you say you have 4 even though you only have 2.

Kids don't do that. At least not all the time. One day I notice UB talking to a boy twice his age. He was laughing and talking to this kid. The kid was doing the same. Then they started playing with each other. When UB came over, I asked him if who the kid was. He said it was his new friend. I asked if this friend had a name, he said he didn't ask.

AB does that as well. When we go places, he usually makes a new friend. I ask the same question. What was his name? His answer is always the same. I don't know.

It made me realize that what seems to be important to us is definately not important to them.

They don't care if they know the person's name, they just know they made a new friend.

Why can't we all think like kids?

Thursday, February 28, 2008

What do you do with your husband when he's sick?

Hubster has been sick. I'm not really sure what he's got, but we know he's sick.

I don't know what ya'll do when your husbands get sick, but my husband sleeps in the guest room when he's sick.

I know, I'm probably a bad wife and all, but my thinking is that I don't want to get sick.

Because we all know that when the mother ship gets sick, chaos happens. That and I know I won't rest because everyone wants to know when and what they are going to eat and where stuff is.

I don't normally get sick. I get the occasional no good feeling. The queasy upset stomach feeling, but nothing ever happens. I'm also a light sleeper. I wake up with every noise, then have a hard time falling back to sleep, then wake up cranky. And we all know that when mama is not happy, no one is happy.

So this mother ship is trying to stay away from the germ droids.

I was talking to a friend and she pretty much said I was weird for sending my husband to the guest room. I resemble that remark!!
I think he actually enjoys being in a room all alone without his wife wanting to 'talk' about what happened during the day.

In the meantime, I'll just watch TV in bed, all alone, eating oreos.

"What? I've got crumbs everywhere? Oh well, I'll just save them for a midnight snack!"

Wednesday, February 27, 2008

The beauty shop adventure

I went to get my hair done today. Of course, I had to take the boys with me. So before we left the house, I gave them 'The Talk'. You know, the no hitting, no fighting, no pushing, no embarrassing me or else talk. I should have just opened my mouth and left it open for the flies to go in, because it seems that all the boys heard was the air that I was inhaling.

We get to the hair place and things go good. They each sit in a chair, they each play with their own toys, they talk to each other. I am so proud of my boys. (Remind me of this later.)

Adventure Boy gets his hair trimmed while I'm under the blow dryer. Things still seem to be going well. UB is playing with a little girl that is there and AB is sitting on my lap when they are done with him.

When I get my hair washed is when all heck breaks loose. We hear a loud crash. The mother in me knew it was the boys. Not the mother instinct of the boys got hurt, but the mother instinct that they did something wrong.

I try to get up, only to be pushed down by my hair fixer upper lady. I forgot that I had dripping wet hair. She says she'll go look. She comes back saying that the toilet lid has come off it's hinges. By came off, I mean came off. Like screws and everything on the floor.

UB comes and stands next to me with a concerned look on his face. I ask him what happened and he said that AB was trying to look at himself in the mirror by standing on the toilet lid. The lid moved and he slipped. He caught himself by landing his foot in the water. UB thought it was quite humorous that AB's foot was wet from the toilet water.

I give them both a lecture about how they are not going to play video games when we get home if they don't go sit down and behave while we finish up. (This is where I'm to be reminded that I'm proud of my boys)

5 minutes later I hear UB crying in a loud voice. I can't really hear what they are saying because the blow dryer is on my ear. I know they are fighting and both want to sit on the same chair. I'm quite embarrassed by now because people are starting to stare. I'm sure they are saying things that I would say. Things like: "Those boys need discipline", "If those were MY boys I'd do this and that", "I wonder why their mom doesn't tell them anything".

When I'm done, I give them the look, tell them to pick up and out the door they go.

It suddenly gets quiet in the shop. That is, until I open the door and hear my car alarm beeping loudly.

I was tempted to keep walking until I got home. But when I remembered that I lived over 3 miles away, I got in the car and told the kids to not say a word. I guess they figured out that I was not happy, because my car hasn't been that quiet (with kids in it) in a long time.

I'm so glad that they are going to bed early tonight.

Tuesday, February 26, 2008

Scratch n' sniff

Hi! We are 'The boys'. We want to tell you of one way we make mom and dad crazy.

You see these little bottles of cologne? We use these for science experiments, but we also use it to make us smell good. Sometimes we even put it on before we go to bed, especially if the Tooth Fairy is coming for a visit.

We add some drops of cologne in this spray bottle. Then we spray all over the floor. It makes the floor slippery and wet. When we are done spraying the walls, floor and everything else, we spray our hair. It makes our hair smell really good.

Sometimes we forget to tell mom we have smelly water in the spray bottle and she will use it to spray her clothes when she irons. That's when we get in trouble.

But we're not finished there. We then spray some cologne on our brushes to brush the water out that we just sprayed on our hair.

Now we not only LOOK good, but we SMELL good too.
Wanna smell?

Monday, February 25, 2008

How to get a good work out at Wal-Mart

I went to the store for some watersoftener salt. I arrive there and notice that even though they have bags of mulch, bags of manure and bags of potting soil, they don't have bags of salt.

I go in through the Garden Center thinking that I'll make the cross crountry journey around the store to get what I need, then check out through the Garden Center, pay for the salt and have some one load them in my car. I just don't know why my thinking and my doing never communicate.

I also had a request from the boys to pick up some pizza's. Because we eat healthy and cheap, I buy the Tony's 2 for $5 pizza's. They actually are pretty yummy.

As I head on over to the grocery side, I notice the salt that I was looking for, laying nice and neat on a pallet. I decide to get 4 bags now so that I won't forget to get them later. I really don't know what I was thinking then because those bags weigh 40lbs each.

I put them under my basket and my work out started. Next time you want a complete workout, load them baby's under your basket and walk around the store. Guaranteed to make you at least get that heart pumping a little faster.

I'm sure I'm looking a little strange to people as I take off and almost lose control of the basket several times. I don't know why I bite my lip and wrinkle my forehead when I'm trying to push this heavy load. I looked wonderful with my tongue hanging out the side of my mouth as I grunted to keep the basket with an extra 160lbs under control.

Not to worry because by the time I made the journey around the store, I wasn't grunting anymore. Only had that toungue out. Big improvement I thought.

I was rewarded by finding a dollar on the floor. As I bend to pick it up, I look around to see if anyone is around. Then I look to see if maybe there is a camera or something following me around. I put the dollar in my pocket, call a friend to see what she would do, then proceed to the checkout when she informs me she would keep it.

So if you happen to see "Smile you are on candid camera" or a reality show similar to it, and they have a segment on "what would you do if you found a dollar?" You might see me on there.
You can't miss me. Remember, I'm the doofus with the 160lbs of salt under her basket, tongue hanging out the side of her mouth as she bites it and pushing with all her might while scrunching her forehead.

Friday, February 22, 2008

What happens when your child turns 5?

Now that UB has turned five, he has a new perspective on life.

Just like we did when we turned five. We thought we were 'it'. We thought we knew it all. We wouldn't be considered a baby anymore, but yet, would still be young enough to get away with certain things.

When we sat down yesterday to do school, I got UB's book out and told him to open it to the page we were at.
He pushes it towards me and says "I'm not in pre-k anymore mom, I'm 5 now."
"Yes," I say as I push the book back towards him,"but you are still in pre-k."
"I'm supposed to be in Kindergarten now because I'm 5 mom." he says as he pushes the book back towards me.
"OK, if you want to be in Kindergarten, then you have to start reading today."
"It's OK mom, I can still be in Pre-K, because I only turned 5 the other day." pulls the book towards him and opens it to his page.

He hasn't only been using his 'age' for school.

He'll tell me a far fetched story and when I ask him how he knows he says, "because I'm 5"

I tell him to pick his toys up when he's done playing with them and he says, "I already know that because I'm 5"

I look for the change that I left in the bathroom and when I ask where it is he says," I put it in my room"
I ask why and he says "because I'm 5"

5 is going to be in alot of trouble this year.

Thursday, February 21, 2008

What kind of Harley Motorcycle should I be?

Hubster is a big fan of racing. Nascar, truck, motocross, you name it he likes it. Speed channel is on at our house all the time when racing season is here. Because we have to watch qualifying on Thursday's, Craftsman truck series race on Friday's, practice and Busch race on Saturday's and then the big one- the Nextel Cup ( I think it's Sprint cup now) race on Sunday's.

We have to rush home from church on Sunday's in order to watch it all. And when Hubster sits on his recliner watching the race on whatever day, we know to leave him alone, because he is one with the TV.

Hubster is building a drag racer. He is outside working on his car whenever he can. He can already taste the feel of the asphalt ( or red dirt here in Oklahoma) in his mouth.

So lately, he's been watching Pinks all out on Speed channel. It doesn't matter that we have lots and lots of channels, only Speed, and occasionally Hallmark Channel, are watched.
Now, if I want to talk to him about something, it has to be in code.

For example:
"Honey?" no response from him.
"Do you know what the boys did today?" still no response. I know he's alive, because I can see his stomach moving.
"The boys, Harley Davidson Sportster 1200 custom, climbed, Harley Davidson Sportster Cross Bones, the house, Harley Davidson Road King Classic, to get, Harley Davidson Dyna Wide Glide, the ball, Harley Davidson VRSCAW V-Rod, to bounce, Harley Davidson Heritage Softail Classic, it into, Harley Davidson Road Glide, the basketball goal, Harley Davidson Ultra Classic Electra Glide."

Hard work for me, but I definately get a response.

I guess I need to become a motorcycle or a fast car. HMMM, let me sit here and ponder this a while. What shall I be?

Wednesday, February 20, 2008

Let's talk potty rooms

Not the rooms found in the luxury of your own home, but those in public places. But first, why are they called restrooms? Do we really rest while in there?

Before kids, I was a potty room snob. I tried to avoid public restrooms as much as possible. I just thought of them as nasty places. Some were clean and pretty enough. Like the bathrooms in Shoji Tabuchi’s place in Branson, now those are nice. But for the most part, restrooms are just not a place to go hang out.

While pregnant, my view of restrooms quickly changed. My bladder was not as it used to be. It seemed to become the size of a pea. People warned me that I would have little to no control of my bladder while pregnant, but did I listen? Why no! I told them that was crazy, that wouldn’t happen to me. So when I laughed uncontrollably at something while pregnant, imagine my surprise when I peed in my pants. Just the beginning of my bladder retaliating on me.

But this isn’t a post about bladders, it’s a post about restrooms.

So while I was pregnant, I made it a point to find out where every public bathroom was while I was out and about.

Then you have kids. You first look for bathrooms to change diapers, then they grow up and need to use the potty. But because you already had scoped out all the bathrooms while you were pregnant, you know exactly which ones are clean and where they are located.

When I was little, my mom taught me to squat. She didn’t want my pretty little hiney to touch the seat. She said that you just never knew what was on the seat.

Try squatting while pregnant. That doesn’t work too well. Try squatting after having kids. That doesn’t work too well either.

You can use those flimsy toilet seat covers that are located on the back wall of the stall, but if you wait until the last minute like me, by the time you put those things on, you are in need of changing some clothes.

I’m sure the engineers weren’t thinking of ‘resting’ when they designed the stalls. The handicap stalls are wide enough, but regular stalls are a tight squeeze.

You have those stalls that when you sit/squat, you hit your head on the stall door. Or how about the stalls that have the toilet paper holder on the right side, but all the way to the back. Reaching for some toiler paper is not an easy task.

Then you have those stalls that the tp holder is located on the left side. I’m a righty, I can’t get my left hand to understand that it has to do all the work. So by the time I have to reach for the tp, my body has to turn in all sorts of angles in order to reach across my body, behind me, to the tp holder. Sort of like playing twister in a stall.

But the stalls that I can’t understand what ‘these people’ were thinking of, are the stalls that have the toilet paper holder that only allows you one square of tp at a time. What is up with that? You’d think that they have a shortage of toilet paper. Nothing like sitting/squatting there with your shiney hiney showing, trying unsuccessfully to get more than three squares out while there is a long line waiting for your stall.

So does anyone have any potty stories? Or am I the only weird one?

Don’t answer the second question, I’m afraid I already know the answer.

Tuesday, February 19, 2008

My baby turns 5 today

Watch out people! There's a new Sheriff in town and he's 5 today!

We went to go buy UB's present yesterday, because I like to wait until the last minute. No, because Hubster has been working a lot lately and I just hadn't been able to go. Plus, I do like to wait until the last minute. That way if the boys change their minds on what they want for their birthday, I don't have to worry about it.

My friend went with us and she helped distract UB while AB and I purchased the gift, then went to put it in the car. I know that AB was excited about UB's birthday, but good grief, I made a mistake in letting him help me.

He didn't tell his brother what we bought him, but he kept telling him that he knew what it was. When we get home, AB wanted to know when we could wrap the present. He asked and asked until I finally got it through to him that when UB was in the shower, then we could do it.

The minute UB was in the shower, AB started saying "It's time to wrap mom, It's time to wrap".
Nothing I could do but get up from trying to relax and go wrap the gift. Then came the problem of where to put the gift. AB found a good hiding place and then proceeded to tell UB that it was in a specific location.

This morning, they woke up at 7am. Yippee for me. Hear the excitement in my voice?
UB wanted to know when he could open his gift. AB was telling him where the gift was. I got up to find this.
Now, I can hardly be mad when two brothers who fight a lot, sit quietly together on the couch acting like they love each other.
When dad got dressed, UB opened his present and this is what he got.
As I type these words, Darth Vadar or Darth Maul or Darth somebody and the Imperial something or other are waiting for me to build their ship that consists of 400 and some pieces.
I'm sure ya'll know what I'll be doing in between school lessons today. Playing Lego!!!

Monday, February 18, 2008

What happened to good family shows?

I have a bone to pick about TV shows. When I was growing up, we didn't watch much TV. Probably because all we had for a while were the three basic channels and not much came out. But what did come out on those channels were shows that weren't centered around sex.

All you see now on TV shows is just that. It's sad that society has to be bought with sex in order to make a TV show or movie be 'popular'. What ever happened to wholesome fun family shows?

Maybe there was some sex in those TV shows that we watched growing up, but I hardly believe that it showed in detail what it was. Sexual innuendos that we as kids didn't get.

Last night was the premier of Knight Rider. Now, I don't know about you, but I liked that show in the 80's. It was full of drama and David Hasselhoff. Be what he may in this time era, but back then he was what girls wanted in a guy. Tall, good looking and was always the hero in the show.
What more could a girl ask for. Not to mention that he drove a pretty cool car. That talked too.

When our family went to Disney, KITT was there. I was so excited. I wanted to see if it actually talked. I was a doofus I know, but it was cool. I got in line to sit on the driver's seat and talk to KITT. I of course asked for Michael and KITT said he was working, but KITT was sweet and I was a happy kid.

Well, when I saw the previews of the NEW Knight Rider, I thought that it would be cool. WRONG. I didn't get past the first 10 minutes because what do you think they showed during that beginning? Yes, sex. AAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGG!

What happened to shows without all that? Shows like Punky Brewster, or Happy Days, or Mork & Mindy. Yes, they were probably corny, but hey, the Fonz was cool.

We also watched shows like The Greatest American Hero, Macgyver, Magnum PI, The Incredible Hulk, The Love Boat and who can forget 'the plen, the plen'.

We also watched American Gladiator last night. Adventure Boy said he wants to try out to be a Gladiator when he grows up. He asked me why I didn't try out. HMMMM, could it possibly be because I'm not fit like them? Or maybe it's cuz I don't want to hurt them. Hee Hee.

But it was fun to watch who won. The guy that won had recently lost his mom to cancer and the girl that won was a mom with twin girls. And you know what the best part about that show was?
No sex involved.

So what other shows from the past did ya'll watch that didn't involve sex?

Thursday, February 14, 2008

Happy Valentine's Day

I'm not much on Valentine's Day. To me it's just another day. I know it's a love day, but shouldn't you show your love everyday?

I'm just saying.
Last night when Adventure Boy got out of the shower, he ran into the school room. I asked what he was doing and he said "nothing mom. I'm just playing with this card."
This morning he brings me this card.
Complete with candies taped to the inside of the card. UB also gave a card, but the reason I didn't post UB's is because he is who we call the sweet one. He's usually doing something sweet to us. AB on the other hand does not. So when Hallmark moments like this happen, I take advantage of them.
It was nice that he made this all on his own without being told to.
Nothing like glitter glue and tape to make a momma happy from her little boy.

Tuesday, February 12, 2008

Why do I even make plans!

Hubster went out of town yesterday and I had already planned on taking over the entire bed. I had big plans people. Plans to sleep right in the middle of the bed. Plans to rent a movie on Pay Per View and stay up late. Plans to read until the wee hours of the morning.

What I didn't realize was that the boys had plans of their own. Plans to bunk in my room while daddy is away. Plans to sleep on MY bed on daddy's side. So much for my plans.

Then things started to look up. We have some friends up from South Texas and one of the girls was going to spend the night here. Things were looking up for me because that meant that while she slept in the spare bedroom, the boys would move back into thier bedrooms.

So I went back to planning on once again sleeping in the middle of the bed, watching a movie, then reading.

Then it started to storm. I was NOT planning on that.

My kids are scared of the thunder and so is the little girl I inherited for the night. I let them stay up until 10pm because the cheif meteorologist said that this storm would go away by 10. WRONG.

As I was getting them ready to all sleep (in seperate sleeping bags) on the floor in Adventure Boy's room, a loud thunder roared and the lightning came flashing in the window. All six eyes looked at me with fear and I asked, "would you all rather go sleep in my room?" I didn't even finish my question before they were all out the door with pillows and blankets en route to my room.

We set a pallet on the floor for one, a sleeping bag for the other and another taking my middle spot on the bed. They quickly fell asleep and I came to watch TV in the living room.

So much for plans.

Monday, February 11, 2008

Is it time to ride my dirt bike? Is it time to ride my dirt bike?

When you homeschool, you spend hours and hours and hours and, well you get the picture, with your kids. They are with you ALL the time. You have to find time to yourself. Whatever time that is, you take it.

I lock myself in the bathroom for my quiet moments, but usually that ends up with the boys hanging outside the door waiting for me to come out. And as soon as I am out, they start talking non-stop again. Not that they stopped when I was locked in the bathroom, I just turn on the exhaust fan and pretend I'm alone on a remote island.

Reality hits as soon as I open the door. I learn to sometimes tune them out. Especially when they are fighting or are asking the million time question. I sometimes forget what they asked because most of the times it's something petty like, "mom, is it time to clean the toilets?". My boys are strange that way. They enjoy cleaning the toilets. I've come to realize that it's because it involves water, but hey, whatever works.

They fight over who will clean the guest bathroom. I usually have to break up a fight over that one. I know that I should appreciate them wanting to, no, begging to clean the toilets, but you just don't understand. When they clean the toilets, because it involves water and all kids enjoy water, there is usually a bigger mess to clean up. For me.

So that is why I tune them out when they ask if they can clean the toilets. Adventure Boy is the worst about asking. He will ask every 15 seconds. That goes for everything. I usually just turn on my invisible mute button on him and continue on what I'm doing.

Hubster doesn't know how to do that. So on Saturday when he told Adventure Boy that he could ride his dirt bike after lunch, AB took it seriously the minute lunch was over.

"Dad, you said after lunch I could ride my bike, can we do it now?" was the question asked 50 times before Hubster said, "I realize it's after lunch, but it is going to be after lunch until lunch time tomorrow, so go play right now".

Hubster is building a drag racer. He is having a blast taking everything out of a car and making it into a really fast car. More to post on another day.

He doesn't know how to 'tune out' Adventure Boy's repetitive questions yet. He's not as good as me. Hee Hee.
After the millionth time (that's probably how you'd feel if you've got a 6 yr old asking the same question all afternoon) of asking Hubster the question right into his ear as he was working on the car, Hubster got distracted. He accidentally poked a hole in his gas tank from being startled when AB spoke.
Now, in Hubster's defense, he works long hours and travels a lot, so when he has some time to work on his hobby, he tries to do it. He also spends time with the boys and they had already ridden their dirt bikes BEFORE lunch for quite a while.
Needless to say, Hubster was not happy.
But the day was not lost. After lunch had finally arrived before dinner , AB and UB were able to ride their dirt bikes before it got too dark.
Meanwhile, Hubster has started to look in his catalogs for a new fuel cell.

Friday, February 8, 2008

Can you tell what that picture is of?

Let's play a game. There is no prize because I have no money to spend on a prize, but you do win recognition that you are better than others at naming pictures.

On the comments, tell me what each one is. You can't just say ice. I know that's ice. What is the ice on? These pictures are pretty easy, I'll try to make them harder next time.






Thursday, February 7, 2008

Valentine's Day Blog giveaway

For those of you who blog and have a blogger or for those of you that want to start blogging, go here for a chance to win a blog design.

There are some really cute designs on there. I sure wish I could win. I would really like a new design.

Being tricked by my two boys

Let me just start off by saying that we have found a wallet. Woo Hoo!!! We can all go back to our daily lives.

We were grocery shopping yesterday. Only because I was out of what seemed like everything in my house. The only option for dinner was shrimp and a can of ranch style beans. Doesn't even sound remotely good.

I had avoided the 'snack' aisle because I told the boys that all they eat is snacks. Goldfish, whales, cheez-its, nilla wafers. You get the picture. I told them they were going to eat healthy food instead. They don't eat vegetables (that they know of) and they hadn't been eating fruit. So we stocked up on fruit. We found these neat little packages from Dole I believe, that is fruit to go. It is sliced apples and grapes in individual packages. Now, I normally slice my own apples and get my own grapes, but since it was snack time during our grocery trip, I bought them. And I was nice enough to let them eat them (outside of my car in the cold) while I loaded the groceries in the car.
Just the right amount of sweet fruit and it satisfied them for the moment.

I can honestly tell you that the boys were not happy with my decision to not buy their favorite snacks. Maybe later I will buy some, but AB had gotten to where he only wanted to eat cheez-its. For breakfast. For lunch. For dinner.

When we went down the cereal aisle, they were looking at me wondering if they were going to get their kind of cereal. I don't really have to worry much there because yes, WE like Apple Jacks and Frosted Flakes, but the boys do eat Honey Nut Cheerios or AB's and Hubster's favorite, Kashi blueberry cereal.

UB wanted Lucky Charms. I grabbed the big box so that it could last a little longer. UB took it out of the basket and said we needed to get the smaller box because it contained a toy. The big box didn't have anything but cereal. I grabbed the box again and put it back in the basket. That's the last of that conversation because I am the mom you know.

When we arrive home and I start unloading the groceries. The boys are actually helping putting things away. Probably because they wanted some apples and I told them they couldn't have some until all the groceries were put away.

I look in the pantry for the food that belongs in there. Making sure that no cold stuff is put on the shelf somewhere. I look over to where the cereal is and I find a SMALL box of Lucky Charms. I remember being distracted by AB when the cereal talk about the boxes was happening with UB. Those two ganged up on me. So much for being the mom.

Hubster chuckled when I told him the story and he said "Don't you remember when you were little? You pick the cereal box according to the toy."

I guess I forgot. But in grown up life, we still do that. We pick out things according to what is offered. And we usually pick the one with the prize. Just like when God is offering us a certain thing that has no reward for us. We say no because we want to get the thing that is not being offered to us that has a reward that will benefit us.

Wednesday, February 6, 2008

The joys of living in the country

The boys had spilled something sticky in their cupholders in the car, so I decided to clean it out. I started pulling Lego's out of places I didn't even know existed, but then I started to see little black things.

Now, before I go on, let me just say that I realize that my car does not deserve the 'cleanest car award', but it also doesn't deserve the 'dirtiest car award' either. I've seen dirtier and messier cars than mine.

While I didn't see any food around, I did see lots of toys and crafts the boys make in church. However, I did see lots more black grains of rice looking things. Upon further investigation, I realized it was mouse poop.

I was astonished. How does a mouse climb into a car?

I started a mad cleaning frenzy. I started to pull everything out of the car. Whatever was in there came out. I even tried pulling the seats out. If Jerry was in my car, and Tom did not exist in my house, I was going to find the little sucker. I like Tom & Jerry, but only in cartoons.

I vacuumed every inch of that car. To say it was gross is an understatement. I'm even embarrassed to write about it, but I want ya'll to know my mishaps.

I opened the glove box to get the little duster to clean out the air vents. Lo and behold, what do you think I found? A stash of food. Not just any food either. This stash consisted of popcorn chicken that was as hard as a rock and half eaten chocolate balls. Jerry was stocking up for the spring.

I called Hubster for support. He wasn't supportive. I hung up.

I was on a mission to find that dirty stinkin' rat.

After cleaning out every corner of the car, wiping down all parts of the car and vacuuming everything from the floor to the ceiling, I still didn't find Jerry.

Hey, at least my car is looking good!

Tuesday, February 5, 2008

Yes, I'm a biker momma without the leather

Hubster and I went on a bike ride on Saturday. I'm not talking bike like thin tires, 18 speed, pedal 'till your legs feel like they are going to fall off bike. No, I'm talking about this bike.

Now, I enjoy taking rides with my husband. I don't think my husband enjoys taking rides with me in enclosed vehicles because then all I do is yack. I'm with the kids all day and want some adult conversation when he's around. He's with adults that act like kids and doesn't want much conversation at home. He does listen to me, but I'm sure that all he hears is 'blah blah blah blah blah'.

So we went on what biker's call 'an awesome riding day'. You know, the sun is out, it's in the 60's and there is hardly any wind out. The kind of weather that biker's look forward to. You see them riding with just a sweatshirt and feeling the wind on their face. Not many bugs out there because it's still a little cold for them.

But not me. I had on a t-shirt with a sweatshirt over, then a heavy coat zipped up all the way to the top. Add some gloves and a full face helmet and I'm good to go. I do have to say that even though my upper body was nice and warm, my lower body was a little cold. I couldn't even feel my toes after a while. That's what I get for wearing tennis shoes with air vents. Silly me.

While on the back of this bike, their is no way to 'talk' to Hubster. So I just start with my warped thoughts. These are my true confessions.

Man, I am so warm, that sun feels good. I wonder how long it will be before my hiney starts hurting. Good grief, I have an itch on my nose. I can open the shield, but my gloves make it a little hard to scratch. Hmmm, I guess I'll just have to wait. Maybe if I twitch my nose the itch will go away. No such luck. OK, just think about something else.

Wow, I never noticed how cows just like to hang out in groups. I wonder if they ever get tired of sniffing each other's utters and butt. Look, there is a goat on the top of a small barn. I wonder if he's thinking like Leo on the Titanic, "I'm king of the world".

I'm kind've tired now, but sleeping on the back of this bike is not an option. I'll just be road kill if I nod off. So I'll just sit here and count cows. Nah, there's too many of those. I'll just count how many other bikers are out. Nah, that hurts my neck trying to turn. I'll just sit here and sing "O Happy Day". But wait, I don't know that song. Oh well, let me just sit here and take in all of God's beauty.

I guess It's OK to talk to myself. I sure hope myself doesn't answer. I sure wish this itch on my nose would go away.

Monday, February 4, 2008

Let's spell out words instead of saying them

Adventure Boy has been spelling lots of words that he hears. I suppose it comes from me spelling words to whomever is on the other end of the telephone line. Especially when I don't want the boys to understand what I'm trying to say.

Now AB is spelling words when he talks. The boys were watching Tom & Jerry and AB told their cousin that T-O-M is D-U-M-B. Their cousin agreed. Then UB says, yes, he is very D-U-M-B in this one show. Their cousin agreed again. AB then said T-O-M is a pretty D-U-M-B C-A-T right? The cousin looks at both of them and asks, "Why don't you all just say the word?"

Their response?

"That's a bad word and we are not supposed to say it."

Friday, February 1, 2008

That's MY spot you're sitting at

Hubster plays in a Christian Band. They were playing at a church on Sunday and as 'groupies', we followed him.

I'm kind've hesitant to enter a different church that is not my own, because you never know where to sit. Everyone (40 and older) that has been a member of a particular church for more than five years claims their pew, their chair, or just their spot.

Unfortunately, in our church, we have some pew claimers. They are mostly elders that don't like to move from their spot. They claim it and get upset with someone that moves them. I'm not sure why, because they can still worship from another spot. Maybe that particular spot has super worship power. Who knows.

Several years ago, we had some visitors come. They sat in a pew and some of the members actually told them that they were sitting in their spot. I'm really not sure why those people never came back to visit us. :)

Then we had an incident in which a particular person would actually leave notes on their spot. Tacky I know, but they felt they couldn't move to another location.

Of course our church is not the only one that does this. I talked to a friend this week and she told me that it's done at her church as well. Those old people sure do throw a fit when they don't sit at the same place every week.

So back to this church we were at on Sunday. I plopped myself down and watched as people starting filling the sanctuary. Several people looked at me, but no one said anything. I'm not sure if I just happened to not sit in someone's spot, or if I was too far up front and no one actually sat there. Most people are back row Baptists.

When I said that no one said anything. I meant it. Not even during welcoming did they say anything. Although, a young boy sitting behind us did say hi and shook our hands. For some reason, I attract the kids not adults.

I actually didn't care whether people greeted me or not, as I was not visiting to join the church. But I wondered why we are all like that. We get scared to approach a stranger, even in church. We get in our moods and say "oh, let someone else greet them, I'm not in any mood". Or really, I don't know why that happens.

But when we see someone 'new' at church, sometimes we put up a guard. But we have to put aside our attitudes and do what Jesus would do. He would welcome anyone. He would approach everyone and make them feel welcome.

So I challenge you to get out of your comfort zone the next time you attend church and greet someone new.